OK, so I was thinking about it a lot before I decided to write about this topic. Needless to say, I often get embarrassed when people say they read this and that thing on my blog. I know I shouldn’t be concerned about their opinion, so this post is an effort towards that attitude.
I should have also write about the trip to Bosnia, but I will postpone it as I always do, to write something more interesting… Well, don’t know how interesting it is to you, but for me it is more then writing a topic that is a reference to the past (i.e. my trip). Anyways…
So, being single for quite a while, I came to realize that when it comes to choosing a partner, I tend to have high standards. By that I mean, I go through some kind of “check list” of the things that a guy should have in order for us to be together. And I am perfectly aware of the fact that there is no such a thing as the perfect partner, however I know as well, that I will not settled up with somebody, who’s significantly bellow my standards.
I am also getting this question pretty often, so am always kind of trying to explain that there are actually several factors that contribute to my partner choice and is hence more complicated than saying “well he needs to be strong” or “he needs to be independent”, so this comes also as a clarification of that issue.
The “Check list”
Without further ado, here are some things I personally find attractive on a guy:
1. Great body. Don’t get me wrong, am not superficial. I also don’t expect a guy to have a six-pack. But, if he is over-weight (or under-weight!), am definitely not going to be attracted to him. It just shows me that he is not having a healthy lifestyle (over-eating, not exercising etc.) or (worst) that he is lazy to commit at least to one of the healthy living factors.
2. He is independent. A guy who is not living under the shadow of his parents, is the most attractive to me. On the other hand: if his mamma still makes him lunch or his laundry, then there is no way I am ever going to be attracted to him.
3. Not obnoxious. This somehow goes with the wrong use of self-confidence (ie. being overly self-confident). Usually, obnoxious guys would think of themselves high in compare to other people. When I notice this on a guy, I am automatically turned off for ever, because I know, it is hard to change this quality and it’s just really, really annoying, not to say tiresome to be with someone, who always puts himself on the first place.
4. Therefore being a little humble goes a long way (for me)! Because this shows that the individual has some space for improvement. I love it when people are aware of their limits. Everyone is and if someone is not, then I would certainly not wanna date this person.
5. He is interesting. This is kind of difficult, because there can be a multitude of ways that a guy can be interesting. I guess if he has a colorful personality, ie. going to new places, trying new foods, watching different kind of movies, being interested in diverse things, having something special that not a lot of people have (a hobby or something that is special to him) then I will definitely hang on. It means that his life (or our life together) will not be boring and that we will always find stuff to do together.
So far, if a guy has all of the above, am guaranteed hooked on him. I will look like that emoticon that has two hearts for eyes: (✿ ♥‿♥) <- me*
How the ideal guy looks like… BUT there are actually some bonus points, which, in case a guy can’t have all the above, can still make me progressively fall in love in him. These include, but are not limited to:
6. Self-Confidence. By this I mean, he is not afraid to approach me, or ask me random stuff. On the contrary: a guy who is shy and will never ask me out, should neither expect me to magically fall in love with him!
7. He insists. If he sticks around and tries to convince me to date him, then I will eventually. It just shows that he is interested enough, which is a kind of assurance that would want to be with me eventually.
8. He has wanderlust or he is willing to travel. Which all go along with number 5, being interesting. A boring person doesn’t have the need to wanderlust, which will make a relationship with me very, very difficult, as I find a bliss in travelling around. Staying in the same place / country for a long time (> 5 months) bores me out. I constantly need some kind of change. At least a visit to the nearby city / country, to calm me a bit down.
9. He is not afraid to spend (for me). OK, I feel I need to clarify this, because am sure many will get the wrong picture. I am very aware of my financial situation and NO am not seeking a way out to leverage this situation. Because I have dated many guys, where I also offered to pay (when I knew that both of us actually are not in a better financial situation). But there is a fine line here. If you are a guy that gets a regular salary and you know I am a student and we are on our first date and still accept to split the bill: then you are doing it r.e.a.l.l.y. w.r.o.n.g. Absolute turn off! You just show, you have no intents to spend on me, which implies you are not really so interested in me.
10. Last but not least, he does it good. I usually don’t talk about this on my blog, but I believe only adults read it, so wth why not (I only hope my dad will never discover this blog). To be honest, if a guy does it really good… well… then sex, will be one of the things I will remember the most from him (!) #justbeinghonest (^^ゞ
The conclusion is: am still single because there is always something missing from the above list. Guys with wrong self-confidence, who are obnoxious, even though are interesting. Or guys with the wrong body. Or just boring guys, where I have to dumb myself down, but are actually extremely good-looking: I have dated them all lol! No, am not a whore! I just have high-standards and as said at the beginning, I would rather stay single than compromise with something lower than my standards.